I’ve poked at some delicate topics during my brief writing career. I questioned the narrative that the Atlanta Spa shootings were racially motivated. I accused a black man of overreacting to a “racist” incident. I even described Robin DiAngelo as the “Vanilla Ice” of anti-racism. But none of these have generated as much controversy, in such a short time, as my article about Dave Chappelle’s special, The Closer.
I can't quickly think of a joke that is not at someone's or something's expense. It stands to reason that someone will find that offensive and others from the same group will think it funny. When my wife first heard bad Asian drivers called DWO (driving while oriental) she laughed like when she discovered the Three Stooges (she was cackling). I'm sure that is offensive to someone.
The thing is, I've heard the best blond jokes from blonds and back in the day when white people didn't think themselves the same, Polock jokes from Polish people, etc. The offended are most likely to loudly speak, creating the impression that they are the official spokespersons for their group.
When a friend, a black man, said, "You know how I can tell when y'all are telling a n****r joke? He quickly turned his head to look over one shoulder and then the other. TRUTH in 1980 Georgia. Some wouldn't find it funny when they saw and knew it, but he knew I'd laugh "with him" without malice.
Trans people do have a special problem. Even with it's horrible history, it was easier for most white people to accept the basic humanity of black people and do their best to shed racist thought than to see transgenders as something understandable. We may do our best to be polite and accommodating but will we ever deep down believe that a person with functional overlies, and uterus who has a baby is a man having a baby? Trans people know that and it may have something to do with their aversion to jokes about it, knowing that many people think them a joke. And to be honest, I think that is pretty damned horrible. I wish it was not that way, but I think it is.
No matter what you do, you are offensive to someone. Killing off comedy and jokes won't fix that.
"Trans people know that and it may have something to do with their aversion to jokes about it, knowing that many people think them a joke."
Yeah, I think this is very true. I mean, the very nature of gender dysphoria is that you know that people see you in a way you don't see (or feel) yourself. I think there's so much talk about affirmation and validation in the trans community precisely because the final piece of easing that dysphoria is having everybody affirms the feelings they have about themselves. Hence Dave's question:
"To what extent do I have to participate in your self-image?"
Transgender identity, unlike any other, requires participation. It's not good enough for everybody to live and let live. You now need to say "he" when your eyes tell you "she". You need to re-address biological facts that have been 99.98% settled for the whole of human history. This is the root of the problem I think. And why the trans community doesn't have much of a sense of humour about themselves.
But this is the problem. I don't think most people have an issue with using the pronouns that others prefer. It's a pretty simple level of politeness. But asking women to share private spaces with or compete against male-bodied people? Yeah, that's a little more complex, because it's not simply about politeness anymore. Here, discussion and compromise is needed. And to have those discussions, we need to be honest about certain realities. Even if those realities don't always feel super affirming.
Did you see Rose Anderson's on Medium last week take including how white some of the movement is? I had already suspected the movement was either too white or being co-opted by white people but I wasn't sure; she answered the question (co-opted by white people) and mentioned the gay male 'Karen' who threatened to call the cops on Chappelle when he challenged them over violating his privacy.
It got to me to wondering whether that's maybe another key piece of the puzzle - not just male entitlement some of these trans chicks aren't ready to give up, but maybe there's a certain level of racial entitlement involved too. Made me wonder whether declaring one's self gay or 'trans' has become the last safe bastion of the overprivileged white male to act like an entitled jerkwad and not be challenged on it (because the Trans Woman is more Sacred than Mary).
Otherwise, much agreed as always with what you've said. I really can't get over how much the drama is over trans issues and not all the other things Chappelle said. My boyfriend and I laughed a bit guiltily over his jokes about coming in a priest's face but we're both a little anti-Catholic over the pedophile stuff (well actually, he's a lot more anti-Catholic but in his defense, he was raised Catholic....I was merely a Rebel Lutheran back in the day LOL).
Actually, I thought there was a little bit of a take-back-the-power moment in that joke. I Googled later to see if Chappelle had ever admitted to being molested by a priest but I couldn't find anything. Whether he was or it wasn't, the way he tells it, as though he was doing the guy a favour and that he looked down on him for asking that, well...maybe there really was a bit of power-reclaiming there, even if it's not the way it actually happened (if it happened at all). The story about fighting a lesbian seemed uncomfortable to.
"maybe there's a certain level of racial entitlement involved too. Made me wonder whether declaring one's self gay or 'trans' has become the last safe bastion of the overprivileged white male to act like an entitled jerkwad and not be challenged on it (because the Trans Woman is more Sacred than Mary)."
Yeah, Dave essentially makes this same argument during the show. Personally, I don't like this way of looking things. Not least because I don't think many white people are choosing to transition so that they can stick it to black folks with impunity.
I had a long discussion with one of my readers about this idea of ranking oppression. That we need a discussion about whether white trans people are more privileged than black people, and yeah, I don't think that it's valuable.
I think some trans people (like some people in every "marginalised" group) have deeply absorbed a message of victimhood and entitlement. And they'll use that to their advantage whenever they can. Just a few weeks ago we saw a black man, Frederick Joesph, do it to a white woman. It's the mindset that's the problem, not the question of the skin colour or genitalia of the person who has it.
I can't quickly think of a joke that is not at someone's or something's expense. It stands to reason that someone will find that offensive and others from the same group will think it funny. When my wife first heard bad Asian drivers called DWO (driving while oriental) she laughed like when she discovered the Three Stooges (she was cackling). I'm sure that is offensive to someone.
The thing is, I've heard the best blond jokes from blonds and back in the day when white people didn't think themselves the same, Polock jokes from Polish people, etc. The offended are most likely to loudly speak, creating the impression that they are the official spokespersons for their group.
When a friend, a black man, said, "You know how I can tell when y'all are telling a n****r joke? He quickly turned his head to look over one shoulder and then the other. TRUTH in 1980 Georgia. Some wouldn't find it funny when they saw and knew it, but he knew I'd laugh "with him" without malice.
Trans people do have a special problem. Even with it's horrible history, it was easier for most white people to accept the basic humanity of black people and do their best to shed racist thought than to see transgenders as something understandable. We may do our best to be polite and accommodating but will we ever deep down believe that a person with functional overlies, and uterus who has a baby is a man having a baby? Trans people know that and it may have something to do with their aversion to jokes about it, knowing that many people think them a joke. And to be honest, I think that is pretty damned horrible. I wish it was not that way, but I think it is.
No matter what you do, you are offensive to someone. Killing off comedy and jokes won't fix that.
"Trans people know that and it may have something to do with their aversion to jokes about it, knowing that many people think them a joke."
Yeah, I think this is very true. I mean, the very nature of gender dysphoria is that you know that people see you in a way you don't see (or feel) yourself. I think there's so much talk about affirmation and validation in the trans community precisely because the final piece of easing that dysphoria is having everybody affirms the feelings they have about themselves. Hence Dave's question:
"To what extent do I have to participate in your self-image?"
Transgender identity, unlike any other, requires participation. It's not good enough for everybody to live and let live. You now need to say "he" when your eyes tell you "she". You need to re-address biological facts that have been 99.98% settled for the whole of human history. This is the root of the problem I think. And why the trans community doesn't have much of a sense of humour about themselves.
But this is the problem. I don't think most people have an issue with using the pronouns that others prefer. It's a pretty simple level of politeness. But asking women to share private spaces with or compete against male-bodied people? Yeah, that's a little more complex, because it's not simply about politeness anymore. Here, discussion and compromise is needed. And to have those discussions, we need to be honest about certain realities. Even if those realities don't always feel super affirming.
Did you see Rose Anderson's on Medium last week take including how white some of the movement is? I had already suspected the movement was either too white or being co-opted by white people but I wasn't sure; she answered the question (co-opted by white people) and mentioned the gay male 'Karen' who threatened to call the cops on Chappelle when he challenged them over violating his privacy.
It got to me to wondering whether that's maybe another key piece of the puzzle - not just male entitlement some of these trans chicks aren't ready to give up, but maybe there's a certain level of racial entitlement involved too. Made me wonder whether declaring one's self gay or 'trans' has become the last safe bastion of the overprivileged white male to act like an entitled jerkwad and not be challenged on it (because the Trans Woman is more Sacred than Mary).
Otherwise, much agreed as always with what you've said. I really can't get over how much the drama is over trans issues and not all the other things Chappelle said. My boyfriend and I laughed a bit guiltily over his jokes about coming in a priest's face but we're both a little anti-Catholic over the pedophile stuff (well actually, he's a lot more anti-Catholic but in his defense, he was raised Catholic....I was merely a Rebel Lutheran back in the day LOL).
Actually, I thought there was a little bit of a take-back-the-power moment in that joke. I Googled later to see if Chappelle had ever admitted to being molested by a priest but I couldn't find anything. Whether he was or it wasn't, the way he tells it, as though he was doing the guy a favour and that he looked down on him for asking that, well...maybe there really was a bit of power-reclaiming there, even if it's not the way it actually happened (if it happened at all). The story about fighting a lesbian seemed uncomfortable to.
"maybe there's a certain level of racial entitlement involved too. Made me wonder whether declaring one's self gay or 'trans' has become the last safe bastion of the overprivileged white male to act like an entitled jerkwad and not be challenged on it (because the Trans Woman is more Sacred than Mary)."
Yeah, Dave essentially makes this same argument during the show. Personally, I don't like this way of looking things. Not least because I don't think many white people are choosing to transition so that they can stick it to black folks with impunity.
I had a long discussion with one of my readers about this idea of ranking oppression. That we need a discussion about whether white trans people are more privileged than black people, and yeah, I don't think that it's valuable.
I think some trans people (like some people in every "marginalised" group) have deeply absorbed a message of victimhood and entitlement. And they'll use that to their advantage whenever they can. Just a few weeks ago we saw a black man, Frederick Joesph, do it to a white woman. It's the mindset that's the problem, not the question of the skin colour or genitalia of the person who has it.
"It's the mindset that's the problem, not the question of the skin colour or genitalia of the person who has it." <-- This!