Thanks Steve - no, you're never a bore - it's always interesting to get a bit of insight into how people think. A few more replies and our dialogue will be worthy subject matter for a post, lmao. I've been the recipient of racial slurs a few times (confusingly for a few different races!), and my prior response is how I tended to frame th…
Thanks Steve - no, you're never a bore - it's always interesting to get a bit of insight into how people think. A few more replies and our dialogue will be worthy subject matter for a post, lmao. I've been the recipient of racial slurs a few times (confusingly for a few different races!), and my prior response is how I tended to frame things. However, if I am understanding you correctly, I see that there is still a pernicious fiction embedded in de-emphasizing the person wielding the imprecation instead of the so-called slur itself. My color, your color, the density and type of melanocytes per cubic centimeter in general isn't a topic worthy of insecurity, so the insult itself is confusing. It's so much happenstance, like our height, or eye color, or what have you. If it were something I had control over and felt insecure about (let's say I've got some pandemic pounds), then the derogation would have more import. I would still have the option of ignoring the person doing it, or embracing it, but that's different than what you're getting at if I grok you correctly.
"I see that there is still a pernicious fiction embedded in de-emphasizing the person wielding the imprecation instead of the so-called slur itself. My color, your color, the density and type of melanocytes per cubic centimeter in general isn't a topic worthy of insecurity, so the insult itself is confusing"
Yep! This is exactly it. To go back to H, imagine his friend was going around to people and saying, "Ha, look at you, you've got less than seven creases on your palm. You suck!"
H's instinct wouldn't be to say, "Hey! Not cool man, you can't say that!" it would be to say, "What the hell are you talking about? Do you realise how stupid you sound?!"
H's friend's hypothetical insult could *only* be offensive if the insult-ee had somehow absorbed the idea that having less than seven creases on their palm is a bad thing. And the instinct to defend them rather than ridicule his friend would *only* exist because H had absorbed those ideas too.
Now, H's friend is still trying to offend people. There's nothing wrong with telling him to stop, even if his insults aren't effective. In fact it's a good thing. But *how* we tell him to stop says a lot about our own beliefs and attitudes.
Thanks Steve - no, you're never a bore - it's always interesting to get a bit of insight into how people think. A few more replies and our dialogue will be worthy subject matter for a post, lmao. I've been the recipient of racial slurs a few times (confusingly for a few different races!), and my prior response is how I tended to frame things. However, if I am understanding you correctly, I see that there is still a pernicious fiction embedded in de-emphasizing the person wielding the imprecation instead of the so-called slur itself. My color, your color, the density and type of melanocytes per cubic centimeter in general isn't a topic worthy of insecurity, so the insult itself is confusing. It's so much happenstance, like our height, or eye color, or what have you. If it were something I had control over and felt insecure about (let's say I've got some pandemic pounds), then the derogation would have more import. I would still have the option of ignoring the person doing it, or embracing it, but that's different than what you're getting at if I grok you correctly.
"I see that there is still a pernicious fiction embedded in de-emphasizing the person wielding the imprecation instead of the so-called slur itself. My color, your color, the density and type of melanocytes per cubic centimeter in general isn't a topic worthy of insecurity, so the insult itself is confusing"
Yep! This is exactly it. To go back to H, imagine his friend was going around to people and saying, "Ha, look at you, you've got less than seven creases on your palm. You suck!"
H's instinct wouldn't be to say, "Hey! Not cool man, you can't say that!" it would be to say, "What the hell are you talking about? Do you realise how stupid you sound?!"
H's friend's hypothetical insult could *only* be offensive if the insult-ee had somehow absorbed the idea that having less than seven creases on their palm is a bad thing. And the instinct to defend them rather than ridicule his friend would *only* exist because H had absorbed those ideas too.
Now, H's friend is still trying to offend people. There's nothing wrong with telling him to stop, even if his insults aren't effective. In fact it's a good thing. But *how* we tell him to stop says a lot about our own beliefs and attitudes.
Really appreciate the exchange. Thank you.