Not sure how to respond to this. I prefer not to be angry about that state of affairs in the military. I just tried to deal with things the best I could. Perhaps our perspectives differ because I was never accorded any respect as a child growing up so when I entered the military, and they treated me far better than my family, it was a wi…
Not sure how to respond to this. I prefer not to be angry about that state of affairs in the military. I just tried to deal with things the best I could. Perhaps our perspectives differ because I was never accorded any respect as a child growing up so when I entered the military, and they treated me far better than my family, it was a win of a sort, in spite of bad boy behavior. And I learned to hold my own with the men to a certain degree.
Here's the thing - if you are a woman and you are breaching the portals of a spoiled boys club, you are going to face headwinds and harrassment. Getting pissed about it does nothing. Just put your head down and pursue your course and let the slings and arrows roll off your back. Barbara Walters said it best. She was asked in an interview how she survived the "Mad Men" era of 60s media. She said "I ignored it." This is powerful. And it's how I overcame child abuse and many other challenges in my life. I worked very hard not to allow the negatives to deter me or even consume my focus.
You create what you focus on. It's that simple.
Things are getting better, btw. There are thousands of organizations devoted to lifting women up and I am on the board of directors for one of them. This suits my philosophy - I would rather work to empower women than fight against men. This approach will get us further, faster. YMMV. Be well! :-)
LOL! Good answer. I hope there's someone like you on the Board at the Citadel...It's quite one thing to keep your head down and ignore it, another to justify it and argue "She just didn't have what it takes," when said writer might well not have made it had HE had to go through that years ago. There's more to that Faludi piece than in that snippet...it was all I could find this morning on limited time. I read her book which is killer, BTW, in exploring different aspects of American masculinity. She described the culture at the Cit as being a bit 'homoerotic'...rituals the guys went through that weren't specifically gay, but had definitely gay overtones ;P
I just wonder how tolerant the Cit would have been had "CADET PINDICK" and "FUTURE TINY DICKTATOR" might have gone over had it ever appeared on Cit dorm doors. Or if someone invented a filk ditty (a 'filk' is what was done with that Candyman verse - taking a popular tune and rewriting the words) that the women sang whenever a cadet they didn't like walked by.
The US military tried to recruit me out of high school and there was no way I would have joined; I knew what they were like and at that point, with the Vietnam War less than 15 years behind us, I had plenty of evidence that they didn't support 'their boys', and I knew they wouldn't 'their girls'. Also, I would have gotten court-martialied for telling them how badly they were running that chicken outfit :)
I had a friend who went into the military who had a big thing for me; I never returned his feelings but we became good friends. I met him less than a week before he had to go to boot camp and he was depressed as hell; college was over and now Sheer Hell was about to start.
At Christmas he came to visit me and my family and he was Private Super Duper Mega Soldier Boy...and he made a career of the military, and retired last year. Never married.
Had we ever gotten together, i would have gotten HIM court martialed with my mouth :)
Not sure how to respond to this. I prefer not to be angry about that state of affairs in the military. I just tried to deal with things the best I could. Perhaps our perspectives differ because I was never accorded any respect as a child growing up so when I entered the military, and they treated me far better than my family, it was a win of a sort, in spite of bad boy behavior. And I learned to hold my own with the men to a certain degree.
Here's the thing - if you are a woman and you are breaching the portals of a spoiled boys club, you are going to face headwinds and harrassment. Getting pissed about it does nothing. Just put your head down and pursue your course and let the slings and arrows roll off your back. Barbara Walters said it best. She was asked in an interview how she survived the "Mad Men" era of 60s media. She said "I ignored it." This is powerful. And it's how I overcame child abuse and many other challenges in my life. I worked very hard not to allow the negatives to deter me or even consume my focus.
You create what you focus on. It's that simple.
Things are getting better, btw. There are thousands of organizations devoted to lifting women up and I am on the board of directors for one of them. This suits my philosophy - I would rather work to empower women than fight against men. This approach will get us further, faster. YMMV. Be well! :-)
LOL! Good answer. I hope there's someone like you on the Board at the Citadel...It's quite one thing to keep your head down and ignore it, another to justify it and argue "She just didn't have what it takes," when said writer might well not have made it had HE had to go through that years ago. There's more to that Faludi piece than in that snippet...it was all I could find this morning on limited time. I read her book which is killer, BTW, in exploring different aspects of American masculinity. She described the culture at the Cit as being a bit 'homoerotic'...rituals the guys went through that weren't specifically gay, but had definitely gay overtones ;P
I just wonder how tolerant the Cit would have been had "CADET PINDICK" and "FUTURE TINY DICKTATOR" might have gone over had it ever appeared on Cit dorm doors. Or if someone invented a filk ditty (a 'filk' is what was done with that Candyman verse - taking a popular tune and rewriting the words) that the women sang whenever a cadet they didn't like walked by.
The US military tried to recruit me out of high school and there was no way I would have joined; I knew what they were like and at that point, with the Vietnam War less than 15 years behind us, I had plenty of evidence that they didn't support 'their boys', and I knew they wouldn't 'their girls'. Also, I would have gotten court-martialied for telling them how badly they were running that chicken outfit :)
I had a friend who went into the military who had a big thing for me; I never returned his feelings but we became good friends. I met him less than a week before he had to go to boot camp and he was depressed as hell; college was over and now Sheer Hell was about to start.
At Christmas he came to visit me and my family and he was Private Super Duper Mega Soldier Boy...and he made a career of the military, and retired last year. Never married.
Had we ever gotten together, i would have gotten HIM court martialed with my mouth :)
I don't do misogynist institutions.
LOL. You are a pistol!