"But I differ from you Steve in one way - It would be Haagen Dazs chocolate chocolate chip."
Heresy!😁
I agree with all of this. But I think there's an even simpler reason why men don't rise to the occasion when they see a woman being harassed; most men, like most women, are agreeable and don't know how to fight and are afraid to risk gett…
"But I differ from you Steve in one way - It would be Haagen Dazs chocolate chocolate chip."
Heresy!😁
I agree with all of this. But I think there's an even simpler reason why men don't rise to the occasion when they see a woman being harassed; most men, like most women, are agreeable and don't know how to fight and are afraid to risk getting beaten up.
It's interesting how these conversations (I'm actually having a similar but far longer conversation in the comments of an article at the moment) flip between saying men need to intervene in potentially violent situations and saying men need to be less violent and aggressive.
Most men *aren't* violent or aggressive. Which means they're enormously less likely to intervene. Because the instinct to fight, even if to protect somebody, requires a genuine readiness to commit violence. It's way harder than most people who have never been in a fight think.
The fear of actual confrontation is real. Ironically, those who have experienced violence and eventually fought back may be more fearless in defending someone being harassed. I speak from the experience of a child in an extremely strange and violent home (mother) who became a teenager who fought back and eventuality a young person who allowed no one to violate me or anyone I was associated with. No fear.
I agree that is an underlying element. Real violence is traumatic. We see so much of it on TV or video games that we seriously underestimate what it is. I mean, look at soldiers returning from Iraq, Vietnam etc., who were traumatized but "not wounded." What, about 90% of them. I knew men back in Brooklyn during my "youth" who could break bones with one punch. Not fun, not easy to confront. So, yeah, there is a reluctance to wade in, fists flying. Not sure what that fine line is between action and common sense reluctance - it's there somewhere. Good points. Question: Have you actually tried Haagen Dazs chocolate, chocolate chip? 😁
"But I differ from you Steve in one way - It would be Haagen Dazs chocolate chocolate chip."
Heresy!😁
I agree with all of this. But I think there's an even simpler reason why men don't rise to the occasion when they see a woman being harassed; most men, like most women, are agreeable and don't know how to fight and are afraid to risk getting beaten up.
It's interesting how these conversations (I'm actually having a similar but far longer conversation in the comments of an article at the moment) flip between saying men need to intervene in potentially violent situations and saying men need to be less violent and aggressive.
Most men *aren't* violent or aggressive. Which means they're enormously less likely to intervene. Because the instinct to fight, even if to protect somebody, requires a genuine readiness to commit violence. It's way harder than most people who have never been in a fight think.
The fear of actual confrontation is real. Ironically, those who have experienced violence and eventually fought back may be more fearless in defending someone being harassed. I speak from the experience of a child in an extremely strange and violent home (mother) who became a teenager who fought back and eventuality a young person who allowed no one to violate me or anyone I was associated with. No fear.
I agree that is an underlying element. Real violence is traumatic. We see so much of it on TV or video games that we seriously underestimate what it is. I mean, look at soldiers returning from Iraq, Vietnam etc., who were traumatized but "not wounded." What, about 90% of them. I knew men back in Brooklyn during my "youth" who could break bones with one punch. Not fun, not easy to confront. So, yeah, there is a reluctance to wade in, fists flying. Not sure what that fine line is between action and common sense reluctance - it's there somewhere. Good points. Question: Have you actually tried Haagen Dazs chocolate, chocolate chip? 😁