"I get where H is coming from but, as almost always, I land more where you are coming from"
Yeah, don't get me wrong. I think H's heart, if not his thinking, is in exactly the right place. You say that intent is what matters, and on one level I agree with this, but I'd say that even intent isn't the most important thing.
"I get where H is coming from but, as almost always, I land more where you are coming from"
Yeah, don't get me wrong. I think H's heart, if not his thinking, is in exactly the right place. You say that intent is what matters, and on one level I agree with this, but I'd say that even intent isn't the most important thing.
Think of your best quality. Whatever it is about yourself that you're most confident about and/or proud of. Now imagine I said something about it that was intended to offend you. Maybe I said that I hate people who are incredibly good-looking, or who are incredibly witty, or who are in great physical condition. How would you react? How much would it hurt you? What would my comments say to you about me?
In fact, it doesn't even need to be something you're proud of. How would you react if I tried to insult the shape of the folds in your ear? Or the number of creases on your palm? Something that you're completely neutral about. Wouldn't you find it ridiculous? Wouldn't you be tempted to laugh?
So yes, I agree with you about intent. If somebody is trying to hurt me that matters. Even if they don't succeed. In fact, the mere attempt to hurt me might be hurtful. But what they can hurt me *about*? That's a different matter entirely. And is entirely based on what I feel about myself.
I think you've put it exceptionally well; the n-word holds a strange, diabolical power over the public imagination. And as far as I can see, the only way to remove that power is to challenge what the the public imagines about race. Specifically, the idea that there's something insult-worthy about being black. Again, both black people and white people have deeply ingrained, unexamined ideas about this. It's past time to expose them to the light.
"I get where H is coming from but, as almost always, I land more where you are coming from"
Yeah, don't get me wrong. I think H's heart, if not his thinking, is in exactly the right place. You say that intent is what matters, and on one level I agree with this, but I'd say that even intent isn't the most important thing.
Think of your best quality. Whatever it is about yourself that you're most confident about and/or proud of. Now imagine I said something about it that was intended to offend you. Maybe I said that I hate people who are incredibly good-looking, or who are incredibly witty, or who are in great physical condition. How would you react? How much would it hurt you? What would my comments say to you about me?
In fact, it doesn't even need to be something you're proud of. How would you react if I tried to insult the shape of the folds in your ear? Or the number of creases on your palm? Something that you're completely neutral about. Wouldn't you find it ridiculous? Wouldn't you be tempted to laugh?
So yes, I agree with you about intent. If somebody is trying to hurt me that matters. Even if they don't succeed. In fact, the mere attempt to hurt me might be hurtful. But what they can hurt me *about*? That's a different matter entirely. And is entirely based on what I feel about myself.
I think you've put it exceptionally well; the n-word holds a strange, diabolical power over the public imagination. And as far as I can see, the only way to remove that power is to challenge what the the public imagines about race. Specifically, the idea that there's something insult-worthy about being black. Again, both black people and white people have deeply ingrained, unexamined ideas about this. It's past time to expose them to the light.
Love the comparison to qualities & attributes, whether positive or something like the folds in an ear. Excellent!