I am able to maintain friendship with people having a wide spread of beliefs. Even when I disagree in a big way, it lets me understand them. see their humanity and not see them as monsters. They are just misguided, or maybe it's me that is. But if you see others as demons, you cannot know them, you only know your own thoughts about them.…
I am able to maintain friendship with people having a wide spread of beliefs. Even when I disagree in a big way, it lets me understand them. see their humanity and not see them as monsters. They are just misguided, or maybe it's me that is. But if you see others as demons, you cannot know them, you only know your own thoughts about them. It's an imperfect world and I can't change that. At best, I can hope to be a positive influence withing my small circle of influence.
"I am able to maintain friendship with people having a wide spread of beliefs."
Me too. But I think a lot of people nowadays talk about this as if it's always a virtue. And it's not. We could reach for extreme examples like the Nazis or the KKK, obviously there are some questions to ask if you maintain a friendship with somebody while knowing they hold views like these, but I saw a tweet recently that presented a far simpler case:
"Ended a 13 year friendship today because he voted for Trump. When I pointed out all of the reasons anyone with a moral compass wouldn’t vote for him, he said 'none of that impacts me or my son so I don’t care.' My last words for him were 'thank God you didn’t have a daughter."
I'm biased towards discomfort when people end friendships over politics, but where s the line between politics and values. If you know that somebody's worldview is essentially, "if it doesn't impact me or my son, I don't care who else gets hurt," how deep can your trust go with that person? How much can you respect them? And without trust or respect, what is your friendship based on?
I think a lot of people are feeling that way about Trump's supporters right now. And I'm looking for ways to bridge the divide despite getting that, not because I *don't* get it or think they're being wholly unreasonble.
p.s. I will also always reject any message that boils down to, "the situation we have is the best we can do." There have been people saying this at every inflection point in history, slavery, segregation, women's rights, gay marriage, you name it. They've been wrong every single time. And made it harder to achieve this progress.
I think it is probably typical for people to care about their own more than about society at large, although most won’t come out and say it.
Take the soft racism of low expectations of people of other races. It is so typical that we would have an extremely small set of friends and that is not unique to any demographic. Most of my friends keep it in check, but I am always disappointed when they express it. Fortunately, I don’t have any friends who would put on a hood and burn a cross in your yard or push an old white lady in front of a bus. If thought becomes harmful action, I would not be able to maintain that friendship. We all have limits. I just don’t get too worked up over people’s political views because I don’t think that the politicians will provide the solutions. They can pass laws and enact programs, but the only change of heart they bring is for the worse.
You may have read the link I put to the WSJ article “Trump’s Promises and Threats: A Guide to What’s Possible.” That is very disturbing. I thought that the separation of powers could do more to prevent it. My MAGA friend goes on and on about RINOs, the Republicans who are not MAGA, and won’t go along with some of the things that require Congressional approval. Are there enough of them who won’t go along with his worst goals?
I don’t know if either the Democrats or Republicans will acquire some inclination to introspection about their fringe. It seems possible to me that Trump’s excesses and policies that are not exactly a great idea (to say the least) will send some toward a more moderate middle. The thing working against that is will the Democrats do the same?
While I think honest communication without angry condemnation is key, it’s probably not going to happen while emotion is as high as it is today. When the all people can afford imports become unaffordable thanks to tariffs there will be some buyer’s remorse. Excesses of the left pushed a lot of people right. Trump might end up pushing them back. Time will tell.
I am able to maintain friendship with people having a wide spread of beliefs. Even when I disagree in a big way, it lets me understand them. see their humanity and not see them as monsters. They are just misguided, or maybe it's me that is. But if you see others as demons, you cannot know them, you only know your own thoughts about them. It's an imperfect world and I can't change that. At best, I can hope to be a positive influence withing my small circle of influence.
A bunch of people feeling this today.
https://youtu.be/qucvehojtJM?si=X4DvyO6B_yS4onNk
"I am able to maintain friendship with people having a wide spread of beliefs."
Me too. But I think a lot of people nowadays talk about this as if it's always a virtue. And it's not. We could reach for extreme examples like the Nazis or the KKK, obviously there are some questions to ask if you maintain a friendship with somebody while knowing they hold views like these, but I saw a tweet recently that presented a far simpler case:
"Ended a 13 year friendship today because he voted for Trump. When I pointed out all of the reasons anyone with a moral compass wouldn’t vote for him, he said 'none of that impacts me or my son so I don’t care.' My last words for him were 'thank God you didn’t have a daughter."
I'm biased towards discomfort when people end friendships over politics, but where s the line between politics and values. If you know that somebody's worldview is essentially, "if it doesn't impact me or my son, I don't care who else gets hurt," how deep can your trust go with that person? How much can you respect them? And without trust or respect, what is your friendship based on?
I think a lot of people are feeling that way about Trump's supporters right now. And I'm looking for ways to bridge the divide despite getting that, not because I *don't* get it or think they're being wholly unreasonble.
p.s. I will also always reject any message that boils down to, "the situation we have is the best we can do." There have been people saying this at every inflection point in history, slavery, segregation, women's rights, gay marriage, you name it. They've been wrong every single time. And made it harder to achieve this progress.
I think it is probably typical for people to care about their own more than about society at large, although most won’t come out and say it.
Take the soft racism of low expectations of people of other races. It is so typical that we would have an extremely small set of friends and that is not unique to any demographic. Most of my friends keep it in check, but I am always disappointed when they express it. Fortunately, I don’t have any friends who would put on a hood and burn a cross in your yard or push an old white lady in front of a bus. If thought becomes harmful action, I would not be able to maintain that friendship. We all have limits. I just don’t get too worked up over people’s political views because I don’t think that the politicians will provide the solutions. They can pass laws and enact programs, but the only change of heart they bring is for the worse.
You may have read the link I put to the WSJ article “Trump’s Promises and Threats: A Guide to What’s Possible.” That is very disturbing. I thought that the separation of powers could do more to prevent it. My MAGA friend goes on and on about RINOs, the Republicans who are not MAGA, and won’t go along with some of the things that require Congressional approval. Are there enough of them who won’t go along with his worst goals?
I don’t know if either the Democrats or Republicans will acquire some inclination to introspection about their fringe. It seems possible to me that Trump’s excesses and policies that are not exactly a great idea (to say the least) will send some toward a more moderate middle. The thing working against that is will the Democrats do the same?
While I think honest communication without angry condemnation is key, it’s probably not going to happen while emotion is as high as it is today. When the all people can afford imports become unaffordable thanks to tariffs there will be some buyer’s remorse. Excesses of the left pushed a lot of people right. Trump might end up pushing them back. Time will tell.