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Steve QJ's avatar

"I'm just one person, hardly a valid statistic, but every single woman who has talked about it with me who was in the military told me that they were raped at least once"

Jesus. That is absolutely horrific. And more horrific that though I'm surprised, I'm also not surprised. You know?

It's a tough one. I understand why this would lead you to the belief that women shouldn't be in combat roles. And I understand your derision at the idea that men should behave themselves. But the alternative is that women have to forgo opportunities because men can't control themselves.

It's the same logic behind women having to wear the burqa to avoid "inflaming men's desires." Right? Men can't control themselves, so women have to adjust their behaviour and be treated as second-class citizens.

I don't have a simple solution. I'm not under any illusions about men's sexual behaviour changing with sensitivity training or the like. But given that I'd bet most of the men who raped the women you talked to weren't punished, I'd still lean towards pursing a climate where it was easier for women to talk about their sexual assault and where men were more likely to be severely punished for it.

The men who behave that way do so because they get away with it. I do believe it would change if they knew they couldn't.

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Peaceful Dave's avatar

It's the other side of the coin. Heads, men should stay out of women's spaces because men... Tails, woman don't belong in a worst case no woman's space available.

Both are about the safety of women, because men. I agree that the situation would improve if men were vigorously prosecuted. If is a very big word.

My comment pertained to "You're a [ ]" as a response to stifle an opposing view, the subject of this commentary. Am I a sexist for holding that view? Are you a sexist for your view on men in women's spaces? We are both addressing an unpleasant reality about the danger to women when in compromising spaces with men. It's hard to discuss the issue when the conversation is hijacked by a subject change to the evil of the speaker for daring to express a point of view. The validity of the idea be damned.

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Steve QJ's avatar

"My comment pertained to "You're a [ ]" as a response to stifle an opposing view, the subject of this commentary."

Ah, I see. Yeah, honestly accusations of transphobia (I'm not called a misogynist or a racist very often😄) just completely roll off me at this point. They'e applied so liberally, so lazily, and so reflexively that they're just meaningless.

If I am a [], fine, show me what I'm missing. I'm honestly listening. But if you're just calling me that to guilt me into silence, or you think just shouting at me will msake me take you seriously, then yeah, good luck with that.

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