Nothing paralyzes and holds human beings back more than the psychology of victimhood, that your current condition is “somebody else’s fault.” And this holds true even when you ARE a victim of something. This applies to being poor, being a historically oppressed racial minority, being disabled, getting injure…
Nothing paralyzes and holds human beings back more than the psychology of victimhood, that your current condition is “somebody else’s fault.” And this holds true even when you ARE a victim of something. This applies to being poor, being a historically oppressed racial minority, being disabled, getting injured by a drunk driver, whatever.
One has to adopt the mindset that if you don’t fix things for yourself, no one will. Without this mindset, human beings are basically dead-on-arrival in terms of personal success.
This is completely consistent with an expectation that a amends should and will be made by the victimizer. But whether that happens is partly out of your control. So advocate for it but focus primarily on yourself, because yourself is the only one you can control.
There is a subset of white liberal progressive that revels in Black victimhood--the Robin DeAngelos of this world. And there is a subset of Black activists that focus on everything but themselves. Ibram X Kendi and his everything is racist universe comes to mind. It’s an infantilizing codependent paralysis that will never improve lives because the very people responsible for improvement them have checked out--that’s someone else’s (the racists) job.
As a white man, maybe it’s naive for me to think that all we need is genuine empathy and deep mutual respect. Empathy means recognizing and acting upon the fact that there is deep unfairness in life and there is an uneven playing field. Respect means that immutable characteristics have no inherent bearing on an individual’s capacity to successfully compete and succeed.
It’s the latter especially that's missing from much of the progressive mindset. It just makes me cringe.
"And this holds true even when you ARE a victim of something"
I really wish more people would wrap their heads around this point. As you said, this mindset is completely consistent with the pursuit of justice. People act as if these two concepts are mutually exclusive when, in fact, the pursuit of justice, first and foremost, requires the willingness not to see oneself as a victim.
I think you're right in saying what we need is genuine empathy. But sad as I am to say it, I think finding that empathy, at least en masse, is unrealistic. Some people are too selfish to be capable of it, some are too busy with their own lives to have it, and some, like DiAngelo and Kendi, make too much money from weaponising a fake version of it.
"Antiracism" has been absorbed almost completely into the culture wars where the aim isn't to fix anything but simply to "won" the other side.
You are probably right about empathy “en masse”. I actually don’t think that true empathy can occur that way. Cant, yes. Huge difference between cant and empathy. But it can happen at the individual level millions of times.
I’ve been thinking a lot about the often difficult interplay between true empathy and respect. Is it possible to have one without the other? How can one possibly respect another if one buys into a preexisting narrative about who he/she is instead of recognizing their individuality? And how can one fully empathize without full internal recognition of human commonality?
Many on the Left accuse those on the the far right of racism--that is, having neither empathy nor respect. Reflecting on these questions makes me think that many on the Left are throwing stones from glass houses. For “the soft bigotry of low expectations” certainly evinces no true respect. And without true respect---of human commonality--how can there possibly be true empathy?
"Is it possible to have one without the other? How can one possibly respect another if one buys into a preexisting narrative about who he/she is instead of recognizing their individuality?"
Yeah, I think respect is foundational for pretty much any positive emotion or sense one could have towards another person. And yes, *aaaabsoluuuutely*, this respect is very notably absent among many on the extreme Left just as it is from many on the extreme Right. It just manifests in different ways.
You might appreciate https://www.city-journal.org/article/the-age-of-cant. Theodore Dalrymple is a truly fascinating individual. He’s been around the block and then some both around the world and as a prison psychiatrist in Britain.
Self righteous scolds almost by definition have the least skin in the game.
Reading Thomas Sowell's book "Black Rednecks & White Liberals," and he makes the point that encouraging a black sense of victimhood helps keep them, on some level, down. An idea which I'm sure many white liberals would hotly deny (and honestly believe) but I think there may be some truth to that, especially for the DiAngelos of the world.
In the '60s sociologists identified what they called the 'Tarzan/Amazon Queen' complex in which white liberal civil rights activists saw themselves as white leaders leading the poor, oh-pressed black people to liberation, centering the kudos on themselves, and unconsciously assuming they were too stupid or oh-pressed to do it themselves. I see that complex *still* in white liberals who buy into the racist notion that black people can't help themselves (and which the Kendis et al of the world happily encourage). That way if you fail, it's not your fault. It's *never* your fault.
Both books are fabulous! And, what you described above is paternalism, writ large. I say, stop patting these people on the head. Look them in the eye and shake their hand instead.
Excellent observations, Steve.
Nothing paralyzes and holds human beings back more than the psychology of victimhood, that your current condition is “somebody else’s fault.” And this holds true even when you ARE a victim of something. This applies to being poor, being a historically oppressed racial minority, being disabled, getting injured by a drunk driver, whatever.
One has to adopt the mindset that if you don’t fix things for yourself, no one will. Without this mindset, human beings are basically dead-on-arrival in terms of personal success.
This is completely consistent with an expectation that a amends should and will be made by the victimizer. But whether that happens is partly out of your control. So advocate for it but focus primarily on yourself, because yourself is the only one you can control.
There is a subset of white liberal progressive that revels in Black victimhood--the Robin DeAngelos of this world. And there is a subset of Black activists that focus on everything but themselves. Ibram X Kendi and his everything is racist universe comes to mind. It’s an infantilizing codependent paralysis that will never improve lives because the very people responsible for improvement them have checked out--that’s someone else’s (the racists) job.
As a white man, maybe it’s naive for me to think that all we need is genuine empathy and deep mutual respect. Empathy means recognizing and acting upon the fact that there is deep unfairness in life and there is an uneven playing field. Respect means that immutable characteristics have no inherent bearing on an individual’s capacity to successfully compete and succeed.
It’s the latter especially that's missing from much of the progressive mindset. It just makes me cringe.
"And this holds true even when you ARE a victim of something"
I really wish more people would wrap their heads around this point. As you said, this mindset is completely consistent with the pursuit of justice. People act as if these two concepts are mutually exclusive when, in fact, the pursuit of justice, first and foremost, requires the willingness not to see oneself as a victim.
I think you're right in saying what we need is genuine empathy. But sad as I am to say it, I think finding that empathy, at least en masse, is unrealistic. Some people are too selfish to be capable of it, some are too busy with their own lives to have it, and some, like DiAngelo and Kendi, make too much money from weaponising a fake version of it.
"Antiracism" has been absorbed almost completely into the culture wars where the aim isn't to fix anything but simply to "won" the other side.
You are probably right about empathy “en masse”. I actually don’t think that true empathy can occur that way. Cant, yes. Huge difference between cant and empathy. But it can happen at the individual level millions of times.
I’ve been thinking a lot about the often difficult interplay between true empathy and respect. Is it possible to have one without the other? How can one possibly respect another if one buys into a preexisting narrative about who he/she is instead of recognizing their individuality? And how can one fully empathize without full internal recognition of human commonality?
Many on the Left accuse those on the the far right of racism--that is, having neither empathy nor respect. Reflecting on these questions makes me think that many on the Left are throwing stones from glass houses. For “the soft bigotry of low expectations” certainly evinces no true respect. And without true respect---of human commonality--how can there possibly be true empathy?
It is, as you say Steve, “fake empathy,” or cant.
"Is it possible to have one without the other? How can one possibly respect another if one buys into a preexisting narrative about who he/she is instead of recognizing their individuality?"
Yeah, I think respect is foundational for pretty much any positive emotion or sense one could have towards another person. And yes, *aaaabsoluuuutely*, this respect is very notably absent among many on the extreme Left just as it is from many on the extreme Right. It just manifests in different ways.
You might appreciate https://www.city-journal.org/article/the-age-of-cant. Theodore Dalrymple is a truly fascinating individual. He’s been around the block and then some both around the world and as a prison psychiatrist in Britain.
Self righteous scolds almost by definition have the least skin in the game.
Reading Thomas Sowell's book "Black Rednecks & White Liberals," and he makes the point that encouraging a black sense of victimhood helps keep them, on some level, down. An idea which I'm sure many white liberals would hotly deny (and honestly believe) but I think there may be some truth to that, especially for the DiAngelos of the world.
In the '60s sociologists identified what they called the 'Tarzan/Amazon Queen' complex in which white liberal civil rights activists saw themselves as white leaders leading the poor, oh-pressed black people to liberation, centering the kudos on themselves, and unconsciously assuming they were too stupid or oh-pressed to do it themselves. I see that complex *still* in white liberals who buy into the racist notion that black people can't help themselves (and which the Kendis et al of the world happily encourage). That way if you fail, it's not your fault. It's *never* your fault.
I need to read the Sowell book. Thank you.
You might also like The Content of our Character - Shelby Steele. A short read at <200 pages but way too insightful to race through.
Both books are fabulous! And, what you described above is paternalism, writ large. I say, stop patting these people on the head. Look them in the eye and shake their hand instead.