Arguing About Gender Is Like Taking Oxycontin

A few days ago, I learned that I’m a level 6 on the trans activist to TERF scale. 

That means that I’m aware that trans women are male, that I avoid using cross-sex pronouns where possible (the truth is offensive to some, and lying is offensive to me), and that I believe males, straight, gay, old, young and trans, should be excluded from female spaces in cases where sex is relevant (this last is actually from level 5, but I also reject the claim that humans can be born in the wrong body, which is from level 7. So let’s call it even).

Believe it or not, this factual, judgement-free, emotionally neutral take is one step below the maximum. Not because it’s even slightly extreme, but because a surprising number of people are hopelessly confused on this issue.

According to a recent survey, 35% of U.K. citizens think that transgender women are female or aren’t sure, rising to 40% for the term trans woman. I’ve lost count of the number of people who don’t understand why it’s unfair for males to compete against females in sports or the realities of “gender-affirming care” or the psychological effects of cross-sex pronouns.

Most people haven’t thought about any of this seriously.

Even wildly popular—and usually very thoughtful—writer, Scott Alexander, has missed a beat or two judging by this article where he cautions against "arguing about gender":

Arguing about gender is like taking OxyContin. There can be good reasons to do it. But most people don’t do it for the good reasons. And even if you start doing it for good reasons, you might get addicted and ruin your life. Walk through San Francisco if you want to see people who ruined their lives with opioids; browse Substack to get a visceral appreciation of the dangers of arguing about gender.

As Alexander says in a follow-up post, several readers, for various reasons, were ”very angry” about this paragraph. The dismissive tone, the comparison with drug addiction, but most galling of all, I suspect, is the fact that he was right. 

Arguing about gender can ruin your life.